Are you insulting me?
Why Insulting Your Prospects Doesn’t Lead to Clients
I’m a little annoyed lately.
I went to get a blow dry and the hairdresser pointed out the many shades of red in my hair; OK that’s true. She then went on to share how she didn’t like my style, how the bangs didn’t work, and I probably shouldn’t even take the stage to speak with my hair in such a state! Of course, her not-so-subtle goal was for me to abandon my current hair “gal” and embrace her.
Later that day, I got a slew of emails insulting my web site: it’s not optimized, it’s too slow, too many graphics, and too tough to find on Google. Really? You found me!
Again, the premise appears to be that if I insult you and tell you what’s wrong, I then hire you to fix it, right? Does this strategy work for anybody?
Getting someone to change is like the lightbulb joke: the lightbulb must WANT TO change! Click To TweetProspects must self-identity; they must recognize their shortcoming and want to transform. It’s like the lightbulb joke: the lightbulb must WANT TO change!
I hear many speakers who I believe could benefit from my coaching. Do I go up to them and shout: you could be so much better if only you hired me? No!
You must get your prospects to self-identify – to raise their hands and say, “YES! I want what you’re offering.”
The same principle is in effect during my workshops; I don’t’ call on folks who don’t want to take center stage. Further, I ask if audience members want feedback before I offer advice.
SO, here’s my question: do you want input into your branding efforts? If so, raise your hand and drop me an email. OR, share your story below.
Never thought of things that way before, but you are right. When I have offered DIY Legal classes, some attendees actually used the materials as taught, but others got a better idea of how hard legal tasks can be and hired me to work for them. Sort of different than the more common approach of telling people that any contract not written by a lawyer is insufficient.
You’ve actually hinted at the RIGHT way to market: give away enough content so that you’ve trust and respect AND then they hire you!
I take the same approach. My talks are chocked full of useful leadership techniques that anyone should be able to enact immediately. The result, those that contact me are open to my approach and recognize they need help. These are my favorite clients.
You are 100% right.
Of course you are absolutely right! One of the first rules of coaching is to ask permission if one is about to “coach” someone even if it is in the course of casual conversation. In the same way, if I as a copy editor see grammatical issues on a website that has problems of grammar, even if I am intending to give advice pro bono, I first ask if the owner is interested in reading feedback before I send my comments.
Giving un-asked for criticism is clumsy at best (unless it is like “your zipper is undone” or “the label is showing on the back of your neck”). To do it when hoping to sell someone… ridiculous!